The Final Battle
by Not Your Average Second Banana
Summary: The lines were drawn. The battlefield chosen. They had fought over everything in those past 7 years. Now it was down to that last decisive battle. Girls.


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. That wonderful duty goes to J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Inc. I also do not own the song "Drops of Jupiter." Again that wonderful duty goes to Train.  
  
The Final Battle  
  
  
  
The lines were drawn. The battlefield chosen. They had fought over everything in those past 7 years. And now it was down to the last decisive battle. Girls.  
  
Harry and Draco had fought over everything. Who had the better broom, who could use that broom better, the whole 'good vs. evil' incident. Now they were going to decide once and for all…who was the sexiest.  
  
It was a simple plan. Hogwarts was holding its first ever talent show. One song would decide it all. Whoever could produce the most female screams would be the winner. Because, brooms are nice, good and evil's just lovely, but girls, that's what it's all about.  
  
It was a secret agreement. They both (surprisingly) decided that the element of surprise would work the best.  
  
~*~  
  
"Thank you, Hannah. That was a lovely rendition of 'Candle in the Wind'," Professor McGonagall said wearily. Lee Jordan fell off his seat, waking himself and the rest of the half-asleep audience.  
  
"Hey, Ron, where'd Harry go?" Hermione asked looking around. "Ron? Ron, wake up! Where's Harry?"  
  
"Probably snuck out, lucky bastard," Ron muttered under his breath.  
  
"And next up is…huh? Oh dear lord, this should be interesting. *Ahem* Up next is Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy singing 'Drops of Jupiter.'" Lee said.  
  
And simultaneously, each jaw dropped, from the tiniest of 1st years to old and wise Dumbledore. Heads snapped to the magical stage, and their worst fears and/or greatest fantasies were fulfilled. There were Hogwarts' greatest hunks standing before them.  
  
It was true. A surprise, to say the least, that this war hadn't raged sooner. (AN: Sorry, I'm not too good at descriptions!) Harry was no longer the short, skinny, 14-year-old we all knew and loved. Six feet tall with bright green eyes that shone behind those sexy glasses, and hair that had been dubbed the "just got laid" look. He was dressed in khaki shorts and a wife beater, showing off his muscles. Draco, on the other hand, was a finely built, 6 ft. 2. His trademark silvery blonde hair was falling into his icy, silver eyes which were framed by long lashes. He was dressed in a black wife beater (AN: Amanda!) and, you guessed it, leather pants. (For all the leather pants lovers) Needless to say, they were hot.  
  
Ron was opening and closing his mouth like a gold fish. Hermione and Ginny, along with Hogwarts' female population, were staring appreciatively at the aesthetically pleasing boys. And then the music started…  
  
~*~  
  
Harry: Now that she's back in the atmosphere…with drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey, hey  
  
And that's when the first scream rang out loud and clear. It was the first shot in the Revolutionary War; all hell broke loose. Soon girls were yelling thing that made Professor Snape blush. Even Professor McGonagall was wearing a smirk that indicated her thoughts were not quite rational at the moment.  
  
Draco: She acts like summer and walks like rain…reminds that's there's a time to change, hey, hey, hey  
  
With a simple, subtle wink, he had girls giggling with pleasure and throwing themselves towards the stage.  
  
Harry: Since the return of her stay on the moon… she listens like Spring and she talks like June, hey, hey, hey  
  
Draco: Tell me, did you sail across the sun  
  
Harry: Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded  
  
Draco: And that heaven is overrated  
  
With a sweeping gesture over himself, he sent more and more girls in fits of hormonal rage. So far, the battle was quite one sided.  
  
Harry: Tell me…did you fall for a shooting star  
  
Draco: One without a permanent scar (He smirked at Harry, who rolled his eyes in response)  
  
Harry: And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there  
  
Now the male population was getting frustrated. These were their girlfriends and friends screaming like idiots for Harry and Draco. Ron turned to Hermione; "Don't they realize how dumb they look just screaming?" But Hermione wasn't paying attention to him. In fact, she was no longer there. Without him realizing it, she had gone up to the stage, standing torn between whether to scream for Harry or Draco. So, she chose rather, to scream for both. Ron joined the other pride-filled men by trying to drag the girls back to their seats. He was pulling Hermione back to the Gryffindor table with only one obstacle. He had to pass Draco's fans. He ducked and dodged many unknown-flying objects, until he bumped into someone unexpected. "Ginny? What in God's name are you doing over here?" But really, like she would have answered. Get yelled at by your brother or stare at a hot guy…hmmm…tough decision.  
  
Harry: Now that's she back from that soul vacation…tracing her way thought the constellation, hey, hey, hey  
  
Draco: She checks out Mozart while she does tae-bo…reminds me that there's a time to grow, hey, hey, hey  
  
Harry: Now that's she back in the atmosphere  
  
Draco: I'm afraid she might think of me as pain ol' Jane  
  
Harry and Draco: Told a story about a man, who is too afraid to fly, so he never did land  
  
With that burst of vocal energy, every girl lost it. Hannah Abbot and Cho Chang had both fainted. Professor McGonagall had leapt to her feet and joined the screaming masses. Boys were picking up girls left and right, so they wouldn't be trampled.  
  
Harry: Tell me…did the wind sweep you off your feet  
  
Draco: Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day  
  
Harry: And head back to the Milky Way  
  
Draco: And tell me, did Venus blow your mind  
  
Harry: Was it everything you wanted to find  
  
Draco: And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there  
  
Casualties were growing by the second. Cat fights broke out amongst the masses, and rather than worrying about the fallen, the boys watched.  
  
Harry: Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken…your best friend always sticking up for you…even when I know you're wrong  
  
The torn Hermione, who up until that point had been edging toward the Draco side, looked ashamed. Though it was drowned by the shrieks, she swore loudly. And she silently made her way to Harry's side, only for pure loyalty to a friend.  
  
Draco: Can you imagine no first dance, freeze-dried romance, five-hour phone conversation…the best soy latte that you ever had…and me  
  
A fresh wave of shrieks echoed through the huge Great Hall. Someone outside might have thought that there was a bloody war going on inside. And they were right.  
  
Harry: Tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet… did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day… and head back toward the Milky Way  
  
Draco: Tell me, did you sail across the sun…did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded…and that heaven is overrated  
  
Harry: Tell me…did you fall for a shooting star  
  
The hungry, glazed over look in all the girls' eyes soared to an exceeding high. The droolers had forgotten that the song would eventually end.  
  
Draco: One without a permanent scar (to which Harry took a deep bow)  
  
Harry: And did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there  
  
~ NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA ~  
  
During the small interlude when they weren't singing, they got an opportunity to see the chaos that had insued. Draco looked over at Harry with a raised eyebrow. Harry just shrugged; even after years of fame, he wasn't quite used to this kind of reaction.  
  
Harry: And did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day  
  
~ NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA ~  
  
Draco: And did you fall for a shooting star, fall for a shooting star  
  
~ NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA, NA ~  
  
Harry and Draco: And you'll only get yourself out there  
  
The final note rang clear, just as the first had. As if coming out into the bright sunlight after being in the dark too long, the girls blinked and looked around wildly. The saw the disarray of their clothes and tangled mess they had gotten themselves into.  
  
When most of them had sheepishly gone back to their seats, McGonagall cleared her throat, also blushing crimson. "That was *ahem* lovely. Next we have Terry Boot playing the cello." She fell back in her seat and muttered, "That's gunna be one tough act to follow."  
  
Harry and Draco took one last good-natured bow before Terry took the stage. It was decided. Apart they were a force to be reckoned with, but with their combined forces, they could conquer the world. The war was over.  
  
  
  
AN: Hoped you liked! Review PLEASE!!! 


End file.
